Thoughts for another day

Feb. 5, 2013.

Today's verse: Matt 26:75. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken: “Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.” And he went outside and wept bitterly. (KJV)

(Pls. read the above before you read further. Thanks)

Sometimes when I’ve fallen before Jesus having sinned against Him, I think, how is it that I sin?  Why is the urge in me to sin so strong?  Will I ever get over sinning and be able to lead a right life before God; the kind of life Jesus lead.  My entire being tells me no!  No?  I’m flummoxed because how can it be no?  How can I ever serve Jesus with the weight of sin over me?  Degenerate and sinful that I am, I can’t for the life of me conceive ever being free of sin; I wonder, is there any hope for me?

Then I look at the Bible and I see the great men of God who figure in it.  Today, I see Peter, a man who was most vocal, but at the same time, a sincere believer and follower of Jesus.  I see him as a complex human, who really, really wants to be with Jesus; to follow and serve Him and all the time he wishes Him well (!) so much so that when Jesus predicts His passion and death, he says, ‘God forbid.’   Then again, He was so sure of always being with Jesus, it didn’t deter him from promising that he will always be there even if everyone left Jesus!  But this very Peter, denies Him, not once, but thrice proving all his bravado of being with the Lord, completely hollow.

When I read this, hope rises in me.  Imagine, Peter: he walked, talked and lived with the Lord, seeing those mighty signs and wonders, but when it came to the crunch, he denied Him.  I ponder, Peter denied Him to save his life, but I deny Him for little things; small pleasures and it makes me feel terrible.  Yet, somewhere far away as far as my mind’s eye can see, I see Him standing on the waters with His arms open wide, inviting me, ‘Come’ and all I can do is forget my melancholic spirit and run to Him.